me and jake.
yes.

how do i like him?
i can usually do the casual sex thing rather well, but i fucked it up.

hahaha you're all so gullible... you cant even tell when other people post! come on!@

Back @ school not even a week and I already made out with a deaf boy!
Micah-19-SMART! - looks like Rocky from RHPS-wrestling/lacrosse team- built like what. be back!

As of today, I am DONE with school.
Now comes the waiting around to go home part that stinks.
Job news tho. My sister is giving me a job at Linens and Things where she is the manager. Should be interesting, looks like ill get 25 hours a week there and around like 15 hours a week at the picture people. that means that I will be working full time this summer. Ive given up on all hopes of getting a car this summer. There's always next year?

I think i need to add one to the makeout list.... lemme see. Yup!

5-Ryan from TKE AGAIn ( 5-15 canada stylee)

I keep pondering how this thing with Stevo will pan out. I mean- dont get me wrong he is um um Good, but ie cheated on the kid like 5 billion times. I dont know that I can play trophy wife like he wants me to. I guess we'll see about that, eh?

Canada was a blast. I <3 my big! She rocks my world. Molson XXX is dangerous! Well..maybe after 9 of them.

Canada Quotes:

" I was inside ...it was Ritzy if you will." Oager on sleeping on the floor.
" Big youre Naked!"-Me to Dawn
" Dana it's not a penis take it out of your mouth!" Dave observing me and my XXX bottle
"Men should wear shirts according to their penis size. All men with small ones shoould wear blue!" Me to a blue shirted Magilla.
" He was hitting on me?whoa!" Me to LH

You're Horny
Let's Do it
Ride It
My Pony

Oh man. Last night was ridiculous. Me and jake had out first make out session. His breath is weird. It reminds me of ScottyJ's. Not bad, but i didnt want to be reminded of Scott while I was making out with another Boy.

So we making oiut and everything was goinf as good as can be expected UNTIL he decided to roll on top of me. I though that I was going to suffocate. It felt like I was in an iron lung for the love of God. Jake's a good looking guy, but he;s a big guy. He has to be a good 250. It;s all crazy muscles upper body style. My thighs are the size of his triceps. Where there's a half naked boy on top of you there really is no nice way to say " Your crushing me to death". I really juat wanted to sleep there last night, but I opted to walked back so I could pass out in my own bed. I smell like Jake right now.

We're starting a new Makeout list. Ready...?

1-Ryan (tke) May2nd 12ish
2-Jake(tke) May2nd 1ish
3- Eric (gdi) May 4th
4-Jake(deaf one) May10th

So ive had a good month so far....4 boys.
Jake would be a good boyfriend.
But I think i already have one?
My favorite Nik quote in a while....
( after seeing a pic of Steve)...

" Oh my GOd.. Shouldn't he be lifting something? He's such a jock!!!"

My favorite quote from my Big this week:

" Little can you please hold my purse while I blaze the trail for us?"

I <3 my Big sis!

Lookin back on this year, it's so hard to actually see a retrospective. I think I learned that it's better not to jump inot someone's bed, and try to jump into their heart's first!

I learned-
Lust will never replace Love.
Friends really arent always forever.
PhotoHouse sucks donkey balls.
Greek life rocks.
Chucky is NOT a virgin.
JUst say no-to Phi Delt Boys.
Don't make lists of people you want to fuck and tell the people their on your list.
I was probably meant to be alone =(
Brian Edge is a big dumbass! But he's like my brother....my incestual brother!!
You find out which friends from highschool were real friends to begin with.
I <3 L Dizzle
I am a makeout bandit.


I found some girly poem that I like about this year:

In a few weeks...
A year has past and now we stand on the brink of returning to a world where we are surrounded by the paradox of everything yet nothing being the same. In a few weeks we will reluctantly give our hugs and, fighting the tears, say goodbye to the people who were once just names on a sheet of paper to return to people that we hugged and fought tears to say goodbye to before we ever left. We will leave our best friends to return to our best friends. We will go back to places we came from and go back to the same things we did last summer and every summer before. We will come into town on that same familiar road, and even thought it has been months, it will seem like only yesterday.

As you walk into your old bedroom, every emotion will pass through you as you reflect on the way your life has changed and the person you have become. You suddenly realize that the things that were most important to you a year ago don't seem to matter so much anymore, and the things you hold highest now, no one at home will completely understand. Who will you call first? Where are you going to work? Who will be at the party Saturday night? What has everyone been up to? Who from school will you keep in touch with? How long before you actually start missing people bargaining in without calling or knocking? Who will get breadsticks with you at three in the morning? How long until you adjust to sleeping in a room by yourself, or how long before you realize your three best friends aren't in the bed next to your room?

Then you realize how much things have changed, you realize the hardest part of college is balancing the two completely different worlds you now live in, trying desperately to hold on to everything all the while trying to figure out what you have to leave behind. In the matter of one day's traveling time, we will leave our world of living next door to our best friends, walking across campus to eat, instant messenger, 8:00 classes, and perpetual procrastination to a world that will seem foreign to us despite the fact that we have lived in it for nineteen years.

But it is different now... We now know the meaning of true friendship. We know whom we have kept in touch with over the past year and whom we hold dearest to our hearts. We've left our high school worlds to deal with the real world. We have had our hearts broken, we've fell in love, we've helped our best friends through the toughest times of their lives, something their even best friends at home couldn't be there for. We've stayed up all night just to be there for a friend. We've partied the night away, doing stupid stuff, but we were always there for each other afterwards. There have been times when we've felt so helpless being hours away from home when we know our families or friends needed us most, and there are times when we know we have made a difference.

A few weeks from now we will leave. A few weeks from now we take down our pictures, and pack up our clothes. No more going next door to do nothing for hours on end. We will leave our friends whose random emails and phone calls will bring us to laughter and tears this summer. We will take our memories and dreams and put them away for now, saving them for our return to this world.

A few weeks from now from now we will arrive. A few weeks from now from now we will unpack our bags and have dinner with our families. We will drive over to our best friend's house and do nothing for hours on end. We will return to the same friends whose random emails and phone calls have brought us laughter and tears over the past year. We will unpack old memories and dreams that have been put away for the past year.

A few weeks from now we will dig deep inside to find the strength and conviction to adjust to change and still keep each other close. And somehow, in someway, we will find our place between these two worlds. In a few weeks.... are you ready?

=========================================================================
Sad and Happy

OK I know. I havent written in a long ass time. Sorority life has kept me out in the real world- away from my puter. Things are going good. My last week of pledging is approaching-quite possibly. Really NOT looking foward to going home this summer. Next summer im staying in Rochy. It doesnt look like Ill be able to afford a car this summer. Working all summer at the picture people tho. Might be getting a 2nd job. I cant wait to see me little L Dizzle. I might even sneek a peek at the infamous Brian Edge aka Hubby. Sara is staying in rochester. BUt Pertek lives in NYC... so thats almost POughkeepsie right?

Jack is Leaving RIt- Sad.

I listen to my ghetto music and actualy miss home.
Can't wait till this summer with LDrizzle and the Geo.
Miss Steve.

My first year at college is coming to a close. Mass amounts of crying.
Want to go home and get away from here...dont want to be under Mom's rules again.
Miss my girls =(

i met steve last night! me and dizzie went to Joe's on Rt 299 in new paltz..and DAMN.
Him crawling up the stairs ontp me kissing my neck and handing kme a drink= nICE half black and half puertorican men ROCK my world!

But yea... He made my weekend. He smells like COCO butter and his skin is SO soft! Not to mention grade A kisser. He left me the BEST voicemail ever!


Hey beautiful.... I cant wait to see you again,, I really have a good feeling about us.

Never say that Dana is not open to men of many races!

crazy weekend coming up!

home sweet home~!

hunnie here i come!

Current Mood: dirty

not such a good time had last night.

first we went to 752 UC....and it was supposed to be some DJ dance party. What was there.... intoxicated 12 year old abercrombie and fitch girls on E....knocking into me as they searched around frantically(probably looking for nsnync) none the less....that party was really bad...there was alot of hair gel involved, and ill be honest it wasnt pretty. The rebirth of 27 felt more like a shoddy C section. It really wasnt all that great. Although I did get to talk to Matt, the drunk kid with red hair, and me and Cristina convinced him that he had hooked up with me - to which he replied " Oh Man I'm soo sorry!". Eddie Munster was there with his girlfriend/roomate/she-man living companion/ Jaba the hut look alike.. whatever! I'm better than her, and at the end of the day, when it really comes down to it, thats all that really matters. Still not seeing how I find a sweaty , hairy Italian that wears cut-off white tank tops Sexy. He smells weird too. Dooter made us a screwdriver that me and Sara shared. Me and Denise are going to be roomies next year. So Excited! Upstairs crew! We're going to be suite-mates with Cristina and Alicijia- awesome! 2nd door on the right- HELL YEA. Im gonna try to see if just me and mom can move me up next year....borrow the crv. Logistically it shouldnt be a problem.We dont need a caravan of Dana's Shit you know? I really want to get one of those big aluminum trunks for my photo Shit.
But back to my night last night. Oh yes.... We're outside waiting for the non drunk bus- aka Trev to pick us up, and we find out that Val's a freak. Which means that me her and Sara have a newfound bond! Sara apparently had a dream that I was making out with her, but dont worry..it was good =) But um yea... we went to the Phi Si house to play the worst game of pool ever. I started to make moves on this guy Christian, but he smelled like weed really bad and he wasnt moving along fast enough for me, so I said BUh Bye. BOobie hugs? " Did she just say anal sex again?" Hehehe/

Current Mood: dirty

I love Rebecca.
More than my goldfish do.
Almost.

Just got off the phone with Hubby. It was so good to ehar form him. I miss him like crazy!!! Crazy weekend ahead.....YAY!

Rebecca spits like a champ.

new Lj program kicks ass. becca likes it in the ass.

Hope that everything is ok with Jake when he gets back to school =(

PhiDelt party tonight....met a cool HoH kid named Koko. Interesting. Glasses up.....beer pong tournament tonight!

Havent talked to Jeremy. I duno. It's weird. I dont get the same feeling from him that I used to. It doesn't feel right anymore. I dont know what to do. I cant avoid the situation forever. It's not fair.
Rush is going good......fun. I miss my Nate =( and My Brian Baby Boi =(. Oh well I can find several replacements tonight. Makeout bandit time!!!!

brian's home...he called me. we just got off da phone. he was in jail for almost a month. i thought he was only in there for 4 days. he had 3 weeks of vacation from work so he's all good and still has a job. he lost weight too...under 200 now.. too skinny for me =) as we were talking, i realized a few key facts. Brian is not my boyfriend. He never has been, and never will be. We're very close friends and pen pals. That's it. Nothing more . Nothing less. Do i love him? Absolutely.. AS little more than a friend. I will not let my feelings for this boy get ahold ofmy anymore. I will not freak out when i dont hear from him for 3 days. I will not worry about him anymore. I cant let myself. He's a 25 year old man, and he can take care of himself. If he wants me he knows how to get me. Let's leave it at that. i'm in rochy and he's in beacon. End of story, done. I let my friendship love be confused for romantic love. Forget about our two year plan. I dont want to hear it. " Some guys in China had a two year plan and they got asassinated"-Tina. I dont want to be killed, so no more two year plan. I was so foolish to let myself fall for this boy. Still I feel like :


[CHORUS]
Oh baby you got what I need but you say i'm just a friend
but you say i'm just a friend cause I can be your fantasy but you
say i'm just friend but you say i'm just a friend

BUt he's home safe, and getting his act together. That's all that matters.

As for the events of today..

Sexy lingerie shopping at Fredricks of hollywood!
www.fredricksofhollywood.com
I saw Ramone, Donnal's friend. The less sexy black version of Donnal. We start talking and he slaps my ass. Um No. He then proceeds to sing " Girl ya got a body-ody ody" to me. Keep in mind he works security at best buy, and this is happening in the front of the store. He gives me his number on my way out and tells me to call him. What is it with me and black guys? More importantly what is the deal with me and Best Buy guys? Hattar, Neil, and now Ramone> I cannot see any more Best Buy cocks. I'm down for the count. So no- I will not be calling him.

I went and saw Jacob da Jewler, and he's still doing his thang. Sexy as Eva. Then i hung out with Cro Maggnum Mikey. Apparently the kid is 25. I had no clue. He's all emo and shit now. Looks so much cuter. So much. He manages some bands now and he's headed down to Florida next week for a while to see his guys through the process. I have his number here, not sure whether I want to call him or not. I am a single lady...but. I dont know . It's not worth it.

I'm looking forward to getting back to school and get my life jumo started again. Classes should be fun! Rushing even more fun! ME and Eric have a movie date. So excited! He seems really nice,,, we;ve talked a few times over break. All he likes to hear from me is Sex sex sex. So we know what he wants. We also know what he wont be getting.

I miss Becca! Life is so quiet without her!

I miss Jack and Johnny and Laurel. Well.. not Johnny that much. I juust wanna make out with him some more, because he was the best kisser ever. I cant remember if Eric was good.. I was drunk- Everything felt good.

Important lessons learned tonight:
Dont get attached.
I am NOT relationship material.
Makeout bandit- Yea that's me.
Shirts that say " Gentlemen start your engine" Rock my world.
Hott black men also rock my world.
I might miss home...just a little.

Current Mood: flirty

Note to Self:
Ask hubby about why Jen Valetta was over his house. SKank.

Brian's case got droppped. My baby is coming home!!!!! I wont be here....but still...My baby boy is not going to jail!!! I love you SO much@!!!! Im coming home next weekend to see ya!

Physically I'm alot better...mentally..not so much.
I want some Edge in my bed. I just feel like i've lost him. So much for our 2 year plan , eh? I just have to go on with my life. But i know that he'll always be in the corner on my mind. We're bringing back the Rock...thats right.the Edge ring.-- to Rochy. He asked that I wear it...and remember him. I got it put into some cheezy gold seting...so it doesnt look like an an engagement ring anymore.. Good deal.
I'm looking at the picture of me and him, and how naive i was thinking that everything would work out in the longrun. i would go away to college and when i got out he would be there for me. I have to stop depending on him for things. I need to rely on myself more. Even though i am very independent, I would still call up Brian and ask him what he thought about the newest boy i had met, or if I was doing the right thing or If i had gone too far with a particular guy. I need to do this myself.

I hate being home. Jon keeps calling me. He's also known as Baby's Daddy- fr those of you playing the home game. HE has a 3 year old daughter, and he's like 30 i think, and relentlesly pursues me like i was a little naked boy and he was Mike Jackson. It's crazy. He called me 8 times today. " I rreally just want to go down on you Dana. please let me." I responded to this by saying " I wish that you would just go away, but you;re still here- so I guess today no one's wishes are coming true."

Ok ok me and jon messed around once. But it was during the end of the summer..and it was while i was on my born again virgin kick, and all i ever did was kiss him.

that kid from the 141 party in colony keeps a calling,:"what are you wearing" to which i respond " go hump a rabbit"
i'm a winner and i'm a 5th year It kid hitting on a chubby red head girl. he's really chill...i look foward to hanging out with him again...soberr. i really think that LDizzle might like the other kid that I um met that night. Chuckles. the TEK guy. I just wont tell her that he;s a man Ho. Clamydia never hurt anyone. I totally outdrankl that kid.

im still having brian flashbacks. dammit.

dan is sleeping over sat night on my aero bed and we're leaving sunday sometime for school.. ROADTRIP!!! I'm excited to not be taking the train back. I want to get back to the swing of things.
Should be fun times.. I have to be a good hostess =)

I talked to Nik today, and it made me feel alot better. We get into these fights and dont talk for a while, but then we make up. I think that we have poor communication. I judt got mad, because I thought that he was getting the girlfriend syndrome. You know,. when you dotn talk to your chick friends because you're so involved with the ball and chain. I dont know what his girlfriend looks like, or acts like. My theory is that if I dont meet her than she doesnt really exist. My feelings still havent changed. I wish that I could be the bigger person here and say that their gone, but Im human, And their still there. Majorly? no. Their 90 percent gone. But that 10 percent is enough to make me pick fights with you, or get mad when i dont talk to you. Or feel left behind somehow. Regardless of my and my unwanted feelings that linger on, Im glad that me and Nik are talking again, because he's a super guy. And i wish you the best in your relationship, and life.

Since Im talking abotu people I used to date, is this the place that I'm supposed to say something nice about Ryan? Because as far as I;m concerned he's stillt Hobbit, and he can still burn in hell.

See there's the dana i missed. I rediscovered the inner bitch in me.

Austin...let's do coffee...Speedracr you sexy vixen you I know you read this!

Home is Boooriinnng.

I;m so happy to be single. Well.. Im pretty sure I am., I have no clue what the hell is going on with my romantic life. I like no drama, no strings, no hurt feelings. Get my drift? And oh yea.. I gave up sex for lent. Ha.

As i was lying in bed today...drifting in and out of my drug induced slumber....i awake to Ricky Lake's talk show...today's show entitled " I'm in love with a man that's in prison.."

It was so weird. It feels like things are falling apart. I want to go back to Rochester where things are ok. Where no one's sick or dying, where everything is happy and fun.

I have this feeling in the pit of my stomach that I'm never going to see brian again, and it tears my heart apart. I cant even type about him without tearing up. i still remember the first time we met. we danced the night away. he danced with me that night , at the chance, and it was the first time he had danced in 4 years. somehow we became friends.

i love him =( i care so much... i dont know what to do.

on a different note... i was going through my cell phone and there are only 3 girls name and 45 guys. I know like 10 of them. i saw sugar's name. i realized that the only reason i have his number- is in case i find out that i have a std.. i know who to blame.
and i just talked to brian's brother "0: lets put it this way brian is fucked hes not getting out for a long time ." My heart hurts.

the only people allowed to read about what happened last night are people who ask me what happened. the entry will remain private for obvious reason. nik and ally you guys will get a serious kick out of it. ally will at least.

here's to dana dancing on the bar, and losing her coat- AND pretending to be mexican.

I talked to Eric about the partay. So suprised he remembered who I was. Apparently there's a picture of me on his camera phone( Im scared to ask). He was really nice. I was teliing him about his friend and my time I spent talking to him. Blond boy is definately not a virgin. DEFINATELY. Eric was all like " Where did you go? We were having a good time". LMAO. Please someone ask for the private entry. FOr the love of God. I am burning in hell for this one. Even worse than the deaf twin brothers. Well- maybe not that bad. Who are we kidding?

Dana you're like a beautiful autumn day-Eric.
Me- What's your name again? Ohh i tought that that was the name of the other guy that ay dios mio.
Burnign as we speak.
Eric has nice shoes. Cristina is on the vice booby squad. LMAo. Congrats for crossing over girls! Dana in the Spring woohoo.

Talking about burning..,,,I was in the shower when the fire alarm went off at 10pm yesterday. I thought God would understand about the twins... It was my X mas present =)

Cristina " Go home with them Dana"
me- Both of them? God damn girl.

sleepover......brian styleee...cant wait to see the ex-hubby. pasta making time not baby making time. thanks mom.